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Oneliners from the pen of the WebShowcase Puzzlemaster and our site Visitors - Page 5

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Oneliners - Food and Drink

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   Have you heard of the four modern food groups; Fast, Instant, Frozen and Microwavable?

   24 hours in a day...24 beers in a case...could this be coincidence?

   'Soup of the day' in a vending machine is just a concoction of all the other liquids that end up in the drip tray.

   What happens to all the discs of mint from out of the middle of a polo? Oh, I forgot, I've seen them in bean bags.

   Tea or Coffee? Coffee, no cream, please. It'll have to be coffee no milk, there isn't any cream.

   If I had some eggs I'd give 'e some eggs and bacon, if I had some bacon.

   Is it true that cannibals won't eat clowns because they taste funny?

   If you think the world is moving at a fast pace, go and join the queue at a supermarket checkout. That'll show you.

   When food shops have a sign which says 'Guide dogs only', who is supposed to read it? The dog?

   Is the hardness of butter proportional to the softness of bread?

   An idealist is someone who notices that a rose smells better than a mushroom and concludes that it'll also make better soup.

   The tip you leave in a restaurant nowadays would have bought the meal 20 years ago.

   Is a 'light year' just a normal year with 20% less fat?

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